Iris Apfel .... inspiring indeed

I am marveled by Iris Apfel. She is probably one of the most rara avis people alive. She is a business woman, interior designer and fashion icon from New York.  And she is 92 years old. She wears a pair of flying saucer glasses and dresses in bold, bright exuberant outfits. She definitely stands out in a crowd with her charming, warm and whimsical outfits.

I know nothing about fashion and I cannot pull off wearing her outfits. It is the story behind the individual that energizes me. In my opinion, she exudes happiness and confidence.I am in awe of her commitment for being her own person. She surrounds herself with the things that make her happy. She is not afraid to be herself. I want to live life like her and be more comfortable under my own skin.

http://www.nytimes.com/video/t-magazine/100000002615161/iris-apfel-on-the-meaning-of-style.html

Happy New Year 2014 From Paris

My boyfriend and I kissed at the stroke of midnight in the RER between Pont de l'Alma and Champ de Mars  Tour Eiffel in Paris. The train stalled in between the stops. We wished each other Happy New Year surrounded by drunk youngsters and joyful cheer "Bonne Année". There were a lot of people  at the Eiffel Tower train stop. It took us almost 15 minutes to resurface from the station.

The sky was clear and the Eiffel Tower was beautifully lid up. While the place was crowded, when I looked up at the magnificent monument, I felt almost as if  it was just the Eiffel Tower and me. I immersed myself with the surrounding , took a few pictures like any faithful tourists and walked away.

Bonne Année à Tous!

Happy New Year! May 2014 be a great year for all of you!

My lessons learned in 2013

As I reflected on past events in 2013, I want to pen down some references that transformed my beliefs in 2013.

An article on Harvard business Review has triggered a need in me to look at scheduling differently. I learned to manage my energy level over a well thought out agenda/plan.  Now, I take into account my energy level at different times of the day and prioritize important tasks during the time when my energy level is the most optimum. I am getting a little smarter about managing me.

Another article on Harvard Business Review talked about promotion-focused and prevention-focused behavior. I knew before reading the article that I am partial towards prevention-focused. The simple test at the end of the article corroborated with my suspicion. I wanted to have traits of promotion-focused and perhaps, I am tired of pointing the obvious while other people can talk convincingly to get recognized with outrages and non realistic ideas. I tried to act promotion-focused but subconsciously I articulated my thoughts and conveyed my intention in a prevention-focused manner.  I only came to realized  my bipolar intent vs action when a coworker pointed it out to me when I was exchanging accounts between two of my direct reports.I am taking this out of context but hopefully I make my point. I said, "If the new assignment does not work out, I will work with you to ensure we get  things moving in the right direction". It would have been a whole lot better if I would have said "This change is good for the team. This guy will be a great fit and I got his and your back and I assure you that he will succeed in this account".  Everyone buys in to someone who can speak convincingly.

We are only human beings and likability is an important trait especially when moving up the corporate ladder. One of my immediate superiors resigned this year. He is a brilliant communicator, driven, someone who gives energy, has a plan and executes his plan.  He made it clear that he was looking to move up and he worked really hard throughout his tenure at the company. He was not liked by a key leader despite giving his best. Alas,  he knew in his guts that he was not going to get what he wanted and resigned. I personally believe that likability has deprived him the opportunity to move further along in the company. It was an appropriate move on his part to seek opportunities elsewhere. C'est la vie. Learn to exercise the power of likability.

Self-convicing is a fallacy. When my ex-superior talked about this "key leader", he was always diplomatic and spoke of this person with reverence. I was not convinced by his responses. After he left the company, it became clear to me that he was not trying to convince me but himself.  Nevertheless he tried. I learned to remind myself to follow my heart. Things will happen in due time. Self-convincing is a waste of time.

Spiders on Christmas

At a Christmas tree decorating party, I picked up a gold spider ornament from the box, unfortunately one of the legs broke. The host rushed over to assess the breakage and proceeded to tell me about the folk legend —On Christmas eve night, the spiders sneaked into the room ,climbed onto the decorated tree, touched every branch and twig so they can see all the lovely shining things. As they crept all over the tree, they left behind a trail of spider web. When the Christ child came to bless the tree, he  saw the joy of the spiders and also the mother's disappointment to see her beautiful tree shrouded in spider web. So the Christ child touched the spider webs and they turned into sparkling gold and sliver. And that's why there are tinsel on Christmas tree and a custom to include a gold or silver spider ornament among the decorations on the tree. 

I am not sure what will happen to the little gold spider with the broken leg. I hope the host will fix it in time for Christmas.  

Merry Christmas to all!

What is your personal brand ?

I have been mulling over this question for the past few days— "What is my personal brand?". I have attended a meeting where the guest speaker had asked us to think about our personal brand and then to share our personal brand with the person next to us. I was so consumed with the question that I had failed to listen to the person next to me. I have no recollection of whatever that was shared with me. As it happened quickly, my response to the individual was "My personal brand is to do the best in everything I do".

Looking back, while my personal brand sounded rather cliché and at the same time I suspect there are a lot of truth in the statement. It was the first thing that came to me when I was under the time pressure to share something. I am not known to make up things. It was impromptu and without analysis paralysis which is a good data point during reflection. 

Now that I have given it some thought, I will respond with the following when I am presented with the same question in future.

 

My personal brand is to seek out things that I love to do and do the things very well. I want to embody the spirit of experimentation and exploration. Based on my experience, when I do the things that I love, new opportunities will be presented to me in some ways or forms.

This reminds me of a quote from Winston Churchill—

Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.

Vision Board, Dream Board, Reminder Board, Action Board and etc..

I have attended a Vision Board party earlier this month. Vision board is a collection of motivational sayings, photos and cut-outs from magazines that probably reflects our dreams and wishes. I was told that I should hang my vision board in my room and look at it everyday. That way my dreams will come true.  I am a believer that dreams will come true through hard work and we can't merely depend on luck or chance. While I am a very practical person, I understand the rational of a vision board from the host's perspective.

Creating and looking at the vision board regularly can help maintain the goal in our subconscious. It reminded me of a friend from primary school who achieved first place in school in a major examination. I recalled her telling me that her mother had pasted newspaper cuttings of students who have achieved full As. The newspaper cuttings kept her focused on the goal and  reminded her to put in the hard work and strived for full As.

“I have been impressed with the urgency of doing. Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Being willing is not enough; we must do.” – Leonardo da Vinci

I have read in many articles that when goals or intentions are declared openly and aloud to others, the action will satisfy our self-identity just enough that our motivation to achieve the goals dramatically decreases over time. After declaring intentions on the Vision Board,  dreaming alone will not turn our dreams into reality. I recognized the behavior as I am guilty of doing just that. I shared my intention to practice yoga 3 times week and included this plan in my resolution. I have almost never practice yoga more than once a week. 

Regardless, creating a vision board is a good excuse to connect with my feminine side. We,girlfriends,  gathered at a friend's place. The party commenced with laughter, food and beverage of choice.  Once the host has accomplished her first mission that was to feed us, we gathered in the living room to peruse magazines and be inspired by our discoveries. There was a moment of peace where the only sound was flipping pages and tearing out pages. Then came the second phase of sieving through our findings and arranging them on our boards before the final stage of sticking the cut-outs to create our masterpieces.

My board represents a reflection of my thoughts while I was going through the process of building my vision board. I was not dreaming about acquiring material objects. I will confess that I was considering to include a picture of an Audi however, it was not at my disposal that evening. I suppose it was not meant to be in this vision board after all.

I tuned inwards as I was building out my vision board. I wanted to be inspired, be less self-critical, have a little self-affirmation, self confidence, self respect and to nurture my body, mind and soul.  I am happy with the end product.  I can guarantee that I will not heed the advice of avid vision board fans about looking at my vision board on a daily basis.  My vision board had help me frame my thoughts and will serve as a reminder and a boast to keep me focus and continue to learn and grow.

Flat Tire Equals Note To Self To Slow Down

It is rare for me to remember my dream. I did just that a few days ago. I don't know where I was in my dream but I remembered vividly that I walked to my car and noticed that two tires were a little flat. I inspected my tires and believed that I can proceed to drive home. My plan was to get my roommate to help me out with the flat tire situation. I got into my car and immediately after I drove out the parking spot, the front tire completely punctured.  I awakened from my dream.

I pulled out my iPAD to search for the interpretation of tires in dreams. Here are some interpretations from the web: 

"To see or dream that you have a flat tire indicates that you are feeling emotionally drained and weary. Your goals are temporarily hindered and as a result, you are unable to progress any further. "

"Almost without exception the tires are defective in some way and thus prevent the vehicle from moving or only allow it to move very slowly. This is an analogy for you not making the progress you desire within the waking world.If the tire is flat in the dream but otherwise appears undamaged it may be possible to pump it back up. Which means that wherever your progress has been stalled in the real world that with a little help you may be able to get on the road again. On the other hand if the tire is punctured it means that the situation is going to be more difficult to correct. The number of tires that are damaged can be relevant. The more tires that are involved the more difficult it will be to make changes in real life."

"To dream of having a flat tire (whether on a car or bicycle) foretells problems caused by hidden jealousy. Try being tactful for a while and controlling your feelings. If you dreamed of changing a flat tire, this is a warning to conserve your resources against an unexpected need."

I take it that my dream is telling me to slow down and be patience. My boss left the company recently who is smart, brilliant and energetic. He is the kind of leader who gives energy instead of draining energy from others. With his departure, my career aspiration will have to wait. Now, I first have to invest time in getting to know my new superior and adjust to the changes in my work environment. I know I am not alone in this endeavor and will not fret about it.

According Louis Pasteur, in the fields of observation, chance favors only the prepared mind. My work will be running auto-pilot while I will take this opportunity to reflect and collect my thoughts. I will immerse myself in learning about a new product offered by my company and perhaps learn something about Big Data. For the time being, I want to be like a sponge where I selectively absorb goodness and avoid ruminating on bad thoughts.  I want to come out strong and prepared for whatever that comes my way in 2014.