My sister planned for two wedding ceremonies. The first was for the groom's family and the next ceremony was for the bride's family and the new couples' friends and colleagues. Since the second ceremony involved the bride's family, I helped out a little bit. The fact that the new couple simplified their wedding, I wasn't sure what's in and what's out in terms of wedding traditions. Also, my parents have been very accommodating to the new couples wishes. Basically, I played by ear and just went along with whatever I was told.
My mother's youngest sister a.k.a my 8th aunt, she came a day earlier. I know that's a lot for any average family. My maternal grandmother has 13 children, over 50 grandchildren and perhaps 5 and growing number of great grandchildren. I am glad to have the opportunity to spend time with my aunt.She is well-versed in wedding traditions for different Chinese dialect groups and is available for wedding engagement to uphold chinese traditions. Without her presence, I highly doubt that any Hokkien wedding tradition will be observed during my sister's wedding. Thank you to you, my dear aunt!
Normally, this is a loud and merry event and typically, the groom and his entourage will go over to the bride's home to pick up the bride. Before he can see his bride, he has to negotiate with the bridesmaids: $$$ in the red packet ,play some games, sing a song, declare his love aloud to the bride and etc. In my sister's wedding, the groom came solo. In lieu of negotiation, the new couple took photograph with friends and relatives.
According to Hokkien tradition, it is inauspicious for the bride's family if the new couple leave the house before 10am in the morning. Therefore we delayed the commencement of the tea ceremony where the couple offered tea to the elderly: my parents, aunts and uncles for my father's side only. Tea was not served to relatives from my mother's side because my grandmother wasn't presence and it is not appropriate to proceed without her.
Later, the couple has to bow first to god(sky) then to our ancestors before proceeding to bow to my parents. It is disrespectful and may anger god or ancestors if the sequence is not followed.
Luckily, my aunt was there to guide the new couple throughout the ceremony at my parent's place.
We took group photographs before the couple was allowed to leave the premise and it was after 10am. My sister brought along with her a fan, upon getting into the car, she disposed the fan. In turn, my mother handed her a new fan. This is uniquely a Hokkien tradition. I understand from my aunt that this action signifies that the bride gets rid of any bad habits and start fresh. Also, it is consider bad luck/clash to see other weddings. She can use the fan to shield from viewing of other people's wedding.
While these tradition may not have any significance to the new couple, I am glad they went along with it. We joined the couple at their wedding reception for a 8-course luncheon. My favorite part was the slideshow about the new couple.
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